Hyundai SnortsCafe
With the big celebrity drug scandal reaching fever pitch I couldn't resist this one...
[:TVNZ:][:Drugs:][:New Zealand:]
[:TVNZ:][:Drugs:][:New Zealand:]
Goat People Anonymous
A collection of "Gawy-isms" and an insight into his twisted mentality by those who know him...
If you like our site, have some nice randomness/Hoffness to submit, or just want to say hi, then click here
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By visiting our blog you agree to the following terms and conditions.
- Gawy is a retarded n00b
- Erin"s Blog is totally cool
- Shoe geekiness is not okay
- The Hoff reigns supreme
- I have permission to use/steal any images you hold the copyright to, including, but not limited to everything.
Thursday, July 21, 2005
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
FGL's Dedication
Against my better judgement, Flying Green Leprachaun has demanded I post this pic of him declaring his undying love... My most sincere apologies to anyone who suffers from bleeding eyes due to this post [:FGL:][:Love:][:Superhero:][:Wrong:]
Monday, July 18, 2005
Planarity
Well I haven't posted in a while due to setting up and then moving Hoff Lovers Anonymous from blogspot to its' own domain, but this annoying mathematical game called Planarity managed to fill in some time in between... I'll get Goat People Anonymous onto the same host as Hoff Lovers Anonymous sometime in the next week.
[:Games:][:Math:][:Internet:][:Hoff Lovers:]
[:Games:][:Math:][:Internet:][:Hoff Lovers:]
Monday, July 11, 2005
Hoff Lovers Anonymous & Hoffmail
I now have a dedicated Hoffblog, make sure to check it out if you luffs The Hoff! GO The Hoff!
[:Hoffmail:][:The Hoff:][:David Hasselhoff:][:Hoff Lovers Anonymous:]
[:Hoffmail:][:The Hoff:][:David Hasselhoff:][:Hoff Lovers Anonymous:]
Saturday, July 09, 2005
The World is Hoff - July Hoff Gallery Advance
Thats right kiddies, it's time for another Hoff Gallery!
Schwarzhoff - Get your hair looking as hot as the Hoff
F@ckHoff!
Get even more of the Hoff down your throat with new Beef Stroganhoff
Can the Hoff save Aussie Cricket? We don't think so...
Wax on, Wax Hoff... just don't wax The Hoff!
The Hoffpital - the latest film starring The Hoff
::Hoff :: The Hoff :: David Hasselhoff :: Photoshop ::
Schwarzhoff - Get your hair looking as hot as the Hoff
F@ckHoff!
Get even more of the Hoff down your throat with new Beef Stroganhoff
Can the Hoff save Aussie Cricket? We don't think so...
Wax on, Wax Hoff... just don't wax The Hoff!
The Hoffpital - the latest film starring The Hoff
::Hoff :: The Hoff :: David Hasselhoff :: Photoshop ::
Friday, July 08, 2005
Tana Umaga's Secret Weapon
The Lions don't stand a chance in tomorrow's test now that the ABs have....
[:Hoff:][:David Hasselhoff:][:The Hoff:][:Lions Tour:][:Lions:][:All Blacks:]
[:Hoff:][:David Hasselhoff:][:The Hoff:][:Lions Tour:][:Lions:][:All Blacks:]
British Exam Papers
For the unaware, there is a slight difference between private schools and comprehensives in Britain.
The Department of Education has realised this and has revised the secondary Maths Exam papers accordingly.
Attached are the most recent maths exam papers for your reference.
MATHS TEST FOR COMPREHENSIVES
Name _____________________________
Nickname__________________________
Gang Name________________________
1. Simon has 0.5 kilos of cocaine. If he sells an 8 ball to Matt for 300 quid and 90 grams to Ollie for 90 quid, what is the street value of the rest of his hold?
2. Damon pimps 3 bitches. If the price is GBP40 a ride, how many jobs per day must each bitch perform to support Damon's GBP500 a day coke habit?
3. Crackster wants to cut the kilo of cocaine he bought for 7,000 quid to make a 20% profit. How many grams of Strychnine will he need?
4. Trev got 6 years for murder. He also got GBP350,000 for the hit. If his common law wife spends GBP33,100 per month, how much money will be left when he gets out?
Extra Credit Bonus: How much more time will Trev get for killing the slapper that spent his money?
5. If an average can of spray paint covers 22 square metres and the average letter is 1 square metre, how many letters can be sprayed with eight fluid ounce cans of spray paint with 20% extra paint free ?
6. Liam steals Jordan's skateboard. As Liam skates away at a speed of 35mph, Jordan loads his brother's Armalite. If it takes Jordan 20 seconds to load the gun, how far will Liam have travelled when he gets whacked?
MATHS TEST FOR PRIVATE SCHOOLS
Name___________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________
(If longer please continue on a separate sheet)
School _______________________________________________
Daddy's/Mummy's Company ____________________________
1. Harry smashes up the old man's car, causing x amount of damage and killing 3 people. The old man asks his local Chief Constable to intervene in the court system, then forges his insurance claim and receives a payment of y. The difference between x and y is three times the life insurance settlement for the three dead people. What kind of car is Harry driving now?
2. Fiona's personal shopper decides to substitute generic and own-brand products for the designer goods favoured by her employer. In the course of a month she saves the price of a return ticket to Fiji and Fiona doesn't even notice the difference. Is she thick or what?
3. Tristram fancies the arse off a certain number of debutants, but he only has enough Rohypnol left to render 33.3% unconscious. If he has 14 tablets of Rohypnol, how is he ever going to shag the other two thirds?
4. If Verity throws up 4 times a day for a week she can fit into a size 8 Versace. If she only throws up 3 times a day for two weeks, she has to make do with a size 10 Dolce & Gabbana. How much does liposuction cost?
5. Henry is unsure about his sexuality. Three days a week he fancies women. On the other days he fancies men, ducks and vacuum cleaners. However he only has access to the Hoover every third week. When will he stand for parliament?
[:England:][:Exams:][:Gangs:][:School:]
The Department of Education has realised this and has revised the secondary Maths Exam papers accordingly.
Attached are the most recent maths exam papers for your reference.
MATHS TEST FOR COMPREHENSIVES
Name _____________________________
Nickname__________________________
Gang Name________________________
1. Simon has 0.5 kilos of cocaine. If he sells an 8 ball to Matt for 300 quid and 90 grams to Ollie for 90 quid, what is the street value of the rest of his hold?
2. Damon pimps 3 bitches. If the price is GBP40 a ride, how many jobs per day must each bitch perform to support Damon's GBP500 a day coke habit?
3. Crackster wants to cut the kilo of cocaine he bought for 7,000 quid to make a 20% profit. How many grams of Strychnine will he need?
4. Trev got 6 years for murder. He also got GBP350,000 for the hit. If his common law wife spends GBP33,100 per month, how much money will be left when he gets out?
Extra Credit Bonus: How much more time will Trev get for killing the slapper that spent his money?
5. If an average can of spray paint covers 22 square metres and the average letter is 1 square metre, how many letters can be sprayed with eight fluid ounce cans of spray paint with 20% extra paint free ?
6. Liam steals Jordan's skateboard. As Liam skates away at a speed of 35mph, Jordan loads his brother's Armalite. If it takes Jordan 20 seconds to load the gun, how far will Liam have travelled when he gets whacked?
MATHS TEST FOR PRIVATE SCHOOLS
Name___________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________________________________________________
________________________________________
(If longer please continue on a separate sheet)
School _______________________________________________
Daddy's/Mummy's Company ____________________________
1. Harry smashes up the old man's car, causing x amount of damage and killing 3 people. The old man asks his local Chief Constable to intervene in the court system, then forges his insurance claim and receives a payment of y. The difference between x and y is three times the life insurance settlement for the three dead people. What kind of car is Harry driving now?
2. Fiona's personal shopper decides to substitute generic and own-brand products for the designer goods favoured by her employer. In the course of a month she saves the price of a return ticket to Fiji and Fiona doesn't even notice the difference. Is she thick or what?
3. Tristram fancies the arse off a certain number of debutants, but he only has enough Rohypnol left to render 33.3% unconscious. If he has 14 tablets of Rohypnol, how is he ever going to shag the other two thirds?
4. If Verity throws up 4 times a day for a week she can fit into a size 8 Versace. If she only throws up 3 times a day for two weeks, she has to make do with a size 10 Dolce & Gabbana. How much does liposuction cost?
5. Henry is unsure about his sexuality. Three days a week he fancies women. On the other days he fancies men, ducks and vacuum cleaners. However he only has access to the Hoover every third week. When will he stand for parliament?
[:England:][:Exams:][:Gangs:][:School:]
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